Saturday, June 29, 2013

Lost perspective

If I wasn't a person who preaches about keeping things in perspective I wouldn't feel so humble right now. I have lost my own perspective.

Over the past couple of weeks, looking for a tow vehicle, I had become a little self-absorbed in this "problem", losing focus on the big picture and forgetting to enjoy the journey I  have chosen. While being out on my road trip, and for months after returning, I had what I would consider a good outlook, a lot of gumption and an overall feeling I could conquer the world. People even commented on how my energy had changed; they could see my happiness written all over my face. This was the biggest compliment and accomplishment I had made; Inner and outer contentedness.

Where did that go? Yesterday, thinking while sanding, I came to some conclusions. I'm a little ashamed of how worked up I was getting over something I would consider a privileged persons problem. I often say, probably to some people's annoyance, that anything above food, shelter and clean drinking water is a privilege and here I am tying myself in knots about what kind of vehicle I need to tow my camper, another privileged item. It would seem I have not been taking my own advice. Yes, I'm allowed to have bad days. I allow myself one, then I must stand up, disband the pity party and get on with it! After all, I have chosen this path and I can change it when I want and go another way. I have this privilege.

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